We're all soon to be ex-fatties!

-0.6kg

2010-03-17T19:59:00.000+11:00

Not a bad effort. This new diet diary is working well.

:D :D :D

2010-03-15T20:23:00.002+11:00

Ok. So. Its time to pony up. After my *amazing* weight loss, this is where I stand. Back at square 1. Well, maybe square 2. I'm still a little lighter and have more knowledge than I did when I started this journey.

Weight: 91.3kg
Chest: 106cm
Waist: 91cm
Hips: 119cm
Thigh: 69cm

Sooo...

2010-03-08T20:32:00.002+11:00

I have been doing bootcamp for the last 6 weeks. It has been a hell of a lot of fun, but I haven't been taking my diet seriously enough. I know, I know. A treat here, a snack there. I rationalise that 'normal' people can do it, why can't I? Well, I'm not normal. I can't do these things.

I have been measured up all over again. As part of the fitness testing for the bootcamp. I don't have my stats at the moment, but I know my lovely 70cm waist... wasted. I'm 91.3kg as of this afternoon. I've hefted another 20+ kg in the past few months. Bugger me sideways with a red hot poker. That's gotta go.

So. For the next 7 weeks, until I get fitness tested again, here is my basic plan.

Breakfast
Oats & Protein
Museli w/ skim milk
both with fruit and maybe some almonds.
Coffee or green tea.
occasionally - toast with cream cheese and a protein shake

M'tea
Low fat yogurt.
Celery/cucumber/capsicum and ricotta
Fruit

Maximum 3 cafe coffees per week.

Lunch
Tinned tuna/chicken and salad w/beans.
Egg (optional)

Leftovers from dinner,
Thai, no rice, extra veg,
Soup and a bit of bread
Meal replacement shake.

1 free lunch per week.

A'tea
Protein bar or apple

Dinner
Soup and toast
1 burger (home made, low fat) w/ salad,
Thai - extra veg, no rice
1 small pita pizza
Meatballs and steamed veg
Marinated lean meat w/salad/steamed veg
Savoury baked ricotta
Casseroles
Ricotta and meat filo w/ steamed veg
Savoury/chilli mince
Chicken skewers

1 free dinner per week

Snacks
Yogurt w/ protein and berries
Baked ricotta w/ protein and fruit
Fruit
Vita weats w/ tuna OR cream cheese OR low fat cheddar
Boiled egg

Other stuff
No daily limit on chocolate. But not allowed more than 1 block dark chocolate per fortnight. Min 70% cocoa.

I have put all of this info into an excel spreadsheet. And plotted out weekly charts. As I enter each meal/snack, I shade the box with a colour. Pale yellow for good. Pale orange for things that aren't bad (i.e. eating a protein bar straight after lunch cuz I'm still hungry. It's not a blow out, but not something I want to do often). Orange for things that are moderately bad. Red for diet fails (cookies), and Black for the worst of the worst.
The idea being that I will be able to look at it visually, without having to read it, and see exactly how my week has been. And the week runs from Monday to Sunday. That way, I can look at it on Sunday and be more motivated to stick to diet while I don't have a work routine to keep me otherwise occupied.

Hello, is this thing on?

2010-03-05T19:45:00.002+11:00

Ok. So. Its been a while. Last we heard, I was super skinny, super sexy, and a fucking champion. And now...

I'm fat again.

Fuck.

I had a bit of a mental meltdown. Ate everything in sight. Lost my gym mojo. Well, really, who could blame me. I have all but stopped the gym at the moment. I am now doing outdoor bootcamp 3 nights a week. And loving it. I have just finished a six week course. New fitness testing Monday.

On Monday I'm going to publish my weight and measurement. And a new diet plan I've written up. I need this blog to lose weight successfully.

Slowly, ever slowly, I'm getting there...

2010-01-24T10:20:00.004+11:00

Just ducked over to Mum's to weigh myself for the first time this year. When I'd jumped on the scales just after Christmas (and all its indulgences) I was happy to see that I had managed to remain at 97kg... hell, I was relieved.

I really need to remember to take my glasses over with me when I do this... cos I can never see the damn numbers clearly. I had to ask mum to tell me what the little red pointer was pointing at because I couldn't be sure. But what do you know... it really was pointing at a new set of numbers.

95!

That's right. Two more kilos have been thrown away. They will not be returning. I will not be looking for them. I don't want them back. I'm two more kilos closer to the end of year goal of 80 by Christmas. My size 16 jeans need a belt to stop them sliding down my arse. All I need now is a job so I can afford to pay for the new clothes I'm going to need, all my netball games and a return to the gym.

:o)

Hey folks... it's the other one. ;o)

2009-11-26T02:17:00.003+11:00

Okay - so Steph is officially AWEsome!

She is, without a doubt, a major inspiration for me and the whole "get fit, get healthy, get rid of the fat (both on my body and in my head)" lifestyle change that I've been on for a while now.

I'm doing things a bit slower than Steph - partly because I'm flat broke and can't get to a gym. But... the four teams I now belong to for netball are definitely working out for me.

I weighed myself at the doctor's the other week.
I'm 97kgs.
Yep.
I've hit my goal for the year with a month to spare. I am under 100kgs BEFORE Christmas!
I could not tell you the last time I was under 100kg.

So, since September last year I have gotten rid of 20.2kgs.

And that means that since my 30th b'day, when I estimate I was rocking out at the 140kg mark, I have gotten rid of 43kgs.
I have friends who weigh that much.
I've taught kids who weigh that much.
How the hell was I carrying that much extra weight around, for god's sake?

So now I am going to keep plodding away, doing my thing, and aim for the final goal of 80kgs by Christmas 2010. But I'll be honest - if I'm only 90kgs by then, I won't mind. Cos I'm feeling pretty good about myself these days. I can look at my reflection and not hate it. And part of that may be due to the fact that a guy, a real honest to goodness, breathing guy, has seen me naked... and liked it (but that's another story with some bitter sadness attached). But it's also due to the fact that I'm starting to like myself. Which makes a really nice change.

Later.

Challenge: Overview and end.

2009-11-14T11:54:00.008+11:00

So I started 12 weeks ago today. Jeez. Can't beleive that was 12 weeks ago. The past 2 weeks have been ok. Better than the weeks before. I kind of adjusted to not having carbs in my diet. Though I was more easily fatigued during training and couldn't really go as hard as I was before. Simon was endlessly patient. I swear that man is a saint.

I killed myself for the last 2 weeks. Cut carbs down to nothing. Trained 8 days solid, including one day sick as a dog, had 1 day off, and trained the last 7. All the way through. In the last 2 weeks I was running less, but rowing harder and getting out of the seat on the bike, up to maximum levels the machine gave me.

I went shopping for dresses 2 weeks prior to the end of the challenge. Found myself a cute little dress. But the size 12 wouldn't do up. I went back a few days later (after payday) and tried them on again. No change. So I bought the 14. It was a little big around the ribs, but the 12 just.would.not.do.up. The last Thursday I tried it on again, just to see how it looked. And it gaped. Massively. About 2 inches away from my back. So I bloody had to go change the dress again.

Last night was tough. I wasn't allowed any liquids. Not even water, after 5pm. Which kinda sucked, cuz I train at 6.30. So I had half a bottle of wate in my cardio routine prior to training. I was taking mouthfuls. When I got to training, Simon said no. Not even mouthfuls. So I had to tip out my lovely, full half bottle of water. Dinner was a tin of tuna, lettuce, onion, and celery. And not much of that. I was flip flopping between feeling nauseous from excitement, and nauseous from nerves. Or maybe I was just nauseous from extreme hunger and thirst. Who knows? After training, they were playing really trippy music videos. It was a completely surreal experience.

The last session was a biggie. We did boxing, absolutely smashed the cardio. I did my own full set, followed by arms and abs on the machine. I was exhausted, but kind of zen. What was done was done. Nothing more I could do. But the nerves still jangled, so I cleaned. The floors, my sheets, dusted the cobwebs, cleaned the light fittings. Yes. The light fittings. I organised my cupboards too. Took all of my flours, sugars etc, and put them into containers. Seriously. I went OCD. I was still up at 1am doing my nails.

This morning the plan was to get up early, straight to the gym (not hard, couldn't have anything to eat or drink) and into the sauna. Had my weight and measurements. I was supposed to head out to breakfast with Simon, but the girls doing the measurements were running late, and he had a client. Anyway. I had museli with banana, strawberry, yoghurt and a drizzle of honey. With a chocolate milkshake with an extra shot of coffee. And it was DIVINE!!! But totally too much for my poor shrivelled stomach. So I sat in the restaurant and rang people until I felt a little better. Then I went grocery shopping and bought sugar, butter, avocado, banana and yoghurt. I'm going to bake bikkies tomorrow. And take them to work to feed the guys there to apologise for being a shit over the past few weeks. And I got soo many compliments wjile I was out. My dress, my shoes, my eyes. I even got told that I should go to the beach and wear a bikini. Thanks, but I'll pass on the bikini.

The measurements themselves were quite good. As soon as we'd done the weight and cm measurements (and while they were doing skin fold testing) I pulled out my phone and ran through the numbers. When I figured out how much I'd lost, I sort of paused a moment, and said it aloud softly. And one of the girls there started crying. I had to ask if it was me or something else she was crying at. Lol. It hit me when I rang mum though. I knew I'd end up crying. At breakfast, when I was talking to Dad. I told him that he was my inspiration halfway through. And I did tear up a little bit.

So. In pictures, we have my results

August 1st. Just before the challenge started. Weighing 82.9kg. I started the challenge at 82.3kg.
Chest: 101 cm
Waist: 83 cm
Hips: 108 cm
Thigh: 64cm
Arm: 32cm

Approximately a size 16

This one is from September 27. Just after the first weigh in.

76.5kg.
Chest: 96.5cm
Waist: 79cm
Hips: 105cm
Thigh: 62cm
Arm: 32cm
Loss of muscle, as well as fat.

approximately size 14

This is me today.
68.8kg.

Chest: 92 cm (-9)
Waist: 73 cm (-10)
Hips: 100 cm (-8)
Thigh: 59 cm (-5)
Arm: 29 cm (-3)

Size 10-12.

I was buying shirts in smalls and extra smalls for 4-6 weeks. Jeans in size 12, and belting them up. But I still saw myself as a size 16 in my head. When I took that last photo, I fell to my knees and started crying. It really hit that that is how I look.

Weekly wrap up

2009-10-31T20:38:00.003+11:00

So I guess its time to do the wrap up of the week. Well. Frankly. I don't react well to not having carbs. There were more than a few tanties. One of which involved me literally ripping shit out of my locker and throwing it across the change room at work. Let me tell the backstory. We're short staffed at work. Its normally me and my bestie who pick up little jobs around the place. But she's in Japan. Lucky bitch, she gets to miss out on me adjusting to the diet.

And so everybody has been leaving the little jobs for me. Well, on Thursday I walked out of work at the very end of the day, 10 days on less than 70g carbs a day, 8 days solid training, exhausted. And found that three people had walked straight out the door, dropped their shit into the overflowing bins and kept going. When I got out of the facility, there were people sitting on computers, without packing up for the day. There were trolleys to clean up, and a whole area to shut down and lock up.

Shit did hit-eth the fan. I shut down and raged, and everybody else left early.

Good news is, I sent out an email the next day, requesting that they no longer leave the little bits to me. And was chatting to my supervisor later, and she was saying that she was feeling like all of these bits were being left for us too, and it was frustrating her.

***
I have had a good chat with one of the bosses at work. They are well aware of what I'm going through. And that I wasn't sleeping well. I was drinking too much (to fill the gaps) at the end of the day, and having to get up 2 or 3 times in the middle of the night to pee, so I was exhausted. They are well aware that this is only for another few weeks.

***
It hasn't all been that bad though. I've lost my treamill mojo. So I'm doing other cardio. Extra time on the cross trainer and I'm now standing up on the bike. And I've started cranking the incline and doing short jogs on that.

Training Wednesday night nearly killed me. I was uncooperative. I was tired. I needed a break. I did my best. And that's all Simon can ask of me.

Friday was much better. Trained well. The rest really helped. I did the alternate cardio set today, and should be back to full gym mojo soon.

I'm aiming to take next Friday off, and then train all the way from Saturday to Friday night. Measurements first thing Saturday morning. We're all prepped out and planned for it.

***
I am somewhat enjoying the diet. I have the most awesome salads for lunch. Dressed with balsamic vinegar and cracked pepper. And tuna. Of course.

Ricotta is not so bad. Really. If I find it boring I can crack some pepper into it. But I'm enjoying it plain.

Strangely, I'm not tempted by foods. A friend of mine was eating a sammich in front of me the other day, and I was quizzing her on how the bread was. And there were varous slices sitting there for everybody's consumption. I had a good look, but wasn't really interested.

I do chew pretty much all day though. Chewing gum is a lifesaver. And I'm in a much better mood when I have it.

***
I was dancing around in front of my mirror (in jeans) the other day, and discovered my abs are visible! I gave them a good grope, and they're freaking ROCK HARD. But they're still covered by squish. *sigh*

***

I am less than 2 weeks out from finishing. Its just dogged tenacity that keeps me going some days. I have started a blister pack of vitamins we got when we started. There are 15 vitamins in it, and its a visual reminder on my bedside table of how far away I am from finishing.

I have booked in for my spray tan too. 3 days out from last photos.

And I went shopping on Thursday night. Checked out some dresses and underwear. I can't wait for payday. I have picked out my 'reward' dress, that I'll wear on my last day. And another pretty everyday dress. And. Most importantly, I have found a good bra that supports and smooths the abdominal area too. Well, it makes it a bit firmer at least.

***
I am looking forward to the end of the challenge though. Its been a long journey and the past 2 weeks have been particularly tough. I don't care if I win or not. I was aiming for that to begin with. But to be honest, I'm so happy with how far I've come now. All I've learnt, all I've done, all I've lost. I'm a winner already. And I just want to have my freaking yoghurt back. I'm looking forward to the small things. I'm going for breakfast with Simon straight after measurements. And I want (though this can easily change) muesli, with yoghurt, banana, strawberries and honey. And a milkshake. Chocolate with a shot of coffee.

The Monday after we're going out to lunch at work. To celebrate the end of the bitchfest that I've been. And a mates b'day. And the return of my bestie. We're gonna share a jaeger (mushroom sauce) schinitzel, with rosti and crumbed mushrooms.

And on that same Monday I'm going to see New Moon in Gold Class. And me and my other bestie will have sushi beforehand, and scones in the cinema.

I don't want to go all out and binge when this is over. I just want the simple, plain things. I want my coffee, scones and yoghurt back. And I want to bake. I miss that.

***

Todays weight 73.5. Not really much of a loss. But going on previous measurements (of putting on 1kg muscle a week) its not really that bad. My jeans are definitely looser than they were. But my 'wish' tops are still tight. I'm pretty muscly through the shoulders.

Ideas

2009-10-26T21:00:00.005+11:00

So I've got a mate who's dieting like crazy with his girlie. Unfortunately, she's more into the idea than the reality of dieting. So I've given him some tips, and I thought it would be nice to have them up here too.

If you have any to add, please do so. I have 3 weeks left of the challenge and fresh ideas will keep me going.

Snack ideas - low fat/low carb
Vegetables (celery/capsicum/cucumber/cherry tomatoes) with ricotta. Or tzatziki. Or any other low carb, low fat dip. This one is also quite nice with ricotta mixed with a little pepper, and a slice of deli meat (turkey, ham, pastrami). Ok, maybe 2 slices of pastrami. Its kinda small.

Ricotta can be mixed with;
mashed egg and cracked pepper
peanut butter
fish/ham/chicken paste.
I'd recommend mostly ricotta with a little of the other stuff just to give it some flavour. Definitely more ricotta than egg. Otherwise it gets a gluggy texture.

You can also bake ricotta. Mix with a little bit of honey and sultanas (this version is not low carb). Or frozen berries. Or cinnamon. Bran with small chunks of banana (again, this one not low carb). Milo. I mix mine with flavoured protein powders and just chuck it in the oven for about half an hour, until the top is golden. Of course, that's hard to tell with the amount of cinnamon I put on it, but even if its undercooked, the middle is still gooey goodness.

Low carb nuts. Just a handful. I don't know about you, but I can't ration them, so I don't have them. Same goes for avocado.

Mushrooms are nice if you can stomach them raw. Serve with a small amount of low fat cheese, 2-3 cherry tomatoes, a few olives and pickled onions.

Low kj cordial or flavoured tea can fill the gaps between snacks/meals.

Chewing gum and sugar free lollies are also good for keeping your mouth busy. But in moderation. They DO have a laxative effect and contain kj, with no nutritional value.

An egg. Seriously. Just an egg.

A low carb protein bar. Just make sure its less than 4g carbs per bar.

Low fat
Yoghurt. I recommend Nestle diet. Seriously, cannot sing its praises enough. No fat, no added sugar. Great, creamy texture and fruity taste. Yoplait 'for me' is also quite good (their apple pie flavour is delish!), but its a smaller serve (150g vs 200g), not quite so creamy, and has a bit of a fake sweetner aftertaste.

Berries. On their own if you want. Or with a small amount of yoghurt. And a sprinkle of oats on top.

If you're a total gym junkie (like me atm) and are into your flavoured protein shakes you can mix a half serve into yoghurt. Its kinda like cake batter and seriosuly nom tastic.

Vita weats are also quite good to snack on. You can put a little low fat cheese on it. Or cheese/tomato/pickled onion. Tomoato/cucumber/mayo. Or slice a pre boiled egg and top with a little dijonnaise. Or just eat them plain.

Fruit - pears, apples etc. I've heard that apples are quite good with a little bit of peanut butter. Or cinnamon (shake on cinnamon, bite. Shake on cinnamon, bite). No banana. Too high in sugar.

Weight watchers fruit snack cups.

2 square of DARK chocolate if you need the sugar hit. I find dark chocolate is more satisfying than milk, and less likely to have you running back to the cupboard for more in 20 minutes. Also, plain biscuits, like milk coffee or arrowroot. Just one serve. 3-4 biscuits.

Meal ideas
Ricotta mixed with lean bacon, fresh herbs and pepper. Sliced mushrooms on top of that. And mixed egg on top of that again.

Chilli mince. With vegetables (capsicum, onion, mushroom). For added kick I put in eggplant basted in peri peri sauce. Muchly hot little bits in my chilli. With beans if you're not going low carb. Seved on lettuce with tzatziki and low fat cheese on top.

Casseroles. On stock or tomato bases. Lots of veges.

Cacciatore - tomato, vege stock, browned chicken, onion, potato (cauli for a low carb option), fresh herbs. Braise. Serve with brown rice.

Home made soups. I particularly like chicken and sweet corn, made with (skinless) BBQ chook.

Lean meats. Marinated. Served with steamed veg (kinda obvious, I know). OR grilled meat with steamed snow peas, cauli, broccoli, beans AND grilled tomato, mushroom, eggplant, onion and zucchini. I call this one my 'fake roast'.

Tuna and salad. With a huge mix of veges (anything you can stomach raw), a small amount of cheese, a few olives (hey, its gotta be interesting), bean sprouts and alfalfa. Dressed with plain balsamic vinegar and cracked pepper.

Stir fry's. 'Nuff said.

Chicken skewers with vegetables. Served on brown rice.

Home made pizza on a wholemeal pita bread.

Sooo

2009-10-24T19:26:00.003+11:00

I'm on the downhill run. Almost there. I'm so close to the end of this, that I can practically smell it. This week I cut carbs. Seriously CUT CARBS. I mean, I'm literally having oats (sans milk) in the morning, celery & ricotta, protein bars, and baked ricotta for snacks, and tuna & salad for lunch, and meat & veg/salad for dinner. I can't have yoghurt or vita weats because they're too high in carbs.

Needless to say, this has been a bit of an adjustment. I've had to add cheese or olives or half an egg into salads. The day I had my last tub of yoghurt, one of my workmates was chattering to me about unimportant stuff. I was almost finished the tub and just wishing she'd shut up so I could savour the moment. In the end I looked up at her and told her that I do love her, but this was my last tub of yoghurt. She grinned and let me savour the goodness of the black cherry. It was then that I realised Pinks 'please don't leave me' was playing in the background. I thought it highly appropriate.

I also make up about 4 days worth of salad, prepackaged in tubs, in advance. I mix egg, penut butter or fish paste into the ricotta to make it less 'cardboard diary'. And protein too. When I bake it. With cinnamon on top. I'm very excited about trying banana ricotta with cinnamon tonight. Yummo! And I have 30g servings of turkey and pastrami frozen, for if I ever serve with plain ricotta.

I have had slip ups. Transitioning to veges and ricotta snacks was hard. Its about half celery, and the other half is cucumber, capsicum and two or 3 cherry tomatoes. The first day I went straight to the work fridge and had a protein bar afterwards. Fail.

And I've started keeping only a few protein bars at home. In the freezer to prevent excess snacking on them. They're bastards cuz they're extra chewy. So when they're frozen they're nigh impossible to eat. The rest of my protein bars are at work. In the fridge there. I have them as an afternoon snack, so I don't really need them at home.

I have resorted (once) to eating penut butter straight out of the jar. The penut butter now lives in the freezer, keeping my protein bars company. I'll pull it out when I need to make more ricotta mix.

Aaand, lastly. I have given up calorie counting. I know enough to be able to keep track of what's allowable, and what isn't. I just need to keep my carbs as low as possible. So I've stopped sending myself around the bend, trying to keep the calories low. Most of my intake is protein anyway, which I should be having.

Todays weight: 74.1. Up a little, but I'm still happy with it.

Wow. Again.

2009-10-17T19:30:00.003+11:00

These are my results so far for the challenge. I think they speak for themselves.

Total weight lost: 8.5kg.
Total cm lost:23
Total muscle gain: 2.4kg*
Total fat loss: 10.9
Body fat %: From 31.65% to 17.4%. That's a difference of 14.25%.
Resting Heart Rate: From 60BPM to 41BPM

*After initial loss in the first 4 weeks, I've gained almost 5kg of muscle in the second.

Happy

2009-10-14T20:34:00.002+11:00

So I lost my gym mojo. I went in on Sunday to do a quick set of cardio and a basic set of weights. I had places to be and family to catch up with. And I had to be there relatively early. When I left I was tired, and cranky. I hurt. And I was sick of the fact that the gym takes up ALL of my time. I mean, its not like I have the greatest social life, or guys lining up to date me, but I'd like to have the option of it at least.

*sigh*

I had no drive, no desire to go on Monday. I reaaallllyyy had to drag myself there. Most of the time, when I do, I perk up once I start exercising. Not Monday. No Sir-ee. I was in full blown PMS meltdown and all my body wanted was carbs and chocolate. I wanted chips and donuts. Despite the fact that the last time I had donuts was about a year ago. And as for chips - one packet before the challenge started. And I don't remember the time before. Yep. Full blown hormonal rebellion.

I did, as an aside, discover how to fake cake batter. If you mix Nestle Diet (cuz I fucking love it in all its creamy, no fat, low carb dietary orgasmness) with a bit of chocolate protein powder, you get the correct texture. That thick, gooey chocolatey mess. Yum. It has a very similar flavour. With the exception that it has a bit of a yogurt after-tang. But still, when you can't have, that's about as close as you're gonna get.

I took Tuesday off. I was feeling ever so slightly more motivated, but I decided that I needed a break. So I took it. Stayed in and did... nothing. Watched Buffy. That's it. I didn't cook. I reheated some Thai chicken/prawn soup. I didn't clean. I just.did.nothing. And it was great.

Today was much better. Had a coffee pre gym to make sure I was perked up. But I didn't need it. I was on fire. Running a bit faster than my norm. I hit my 3K mark about a minute earlier. Did legs with Simon. He told me we're gonna get me spray tanned for the last photos. And that we're going to revamp my diet as of next week. I told him the scales were going up. And he said 'Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. Halfway through the challenge, if all is going well, you'll be putting on weight.' Gee. Thanks Simon. A little late with the info, but still much appreciated. Got complimented by one of the trainers during my session. Hit the cross trainer post session. Had some random woman appraoch me to tell me that she's been watching me for ages, and that I'm doing really, really well. Which put a hell of a smile on my face. Then the next thing I know, its 8pm and I'm leaving the gym. Absolutely on top of the world.

I'm glad I have my gym mojo back. Life is just better at the gym.

Week 7

2009-10-09T21:02:00.003+11:00

So. Its the end of week 7 of the challenge. I'm still working hard. Not that anyone is really that surprised, hey?

Not much to tell this week. I did get a lovely compliment from one of the (gay) guys at work. In writing. Denovos is the cafe name.

Today we had a BBQ for the challenge. It was quite fun. We played games and ran around like fools for an hour, then ate some really taaasty steak and salad.

There was a circuit of sandbags that we had to do various things to. One of which was a shoulder press, doing a squat and lifting the bag over our head to the other shoulder. Squat and repeat. I told one of the girls in the challenge that I could see it breaking over my head, and getting covered in sand. She said she could see it happening to me. Sure enough, when she was in front of me, she put the bag down, turned to me and said, 'that thing has got a leak in it'. I'm just grateful its the day I wash my hair :$

After the BBQ we headed back to the gym and I clocked up 30 minutes running on the treadmill. I didn't really feel that I'd done a strenuous enough work out.

Todays weight - 74.8

Inspiration

2009-10-04T15:07:00.002+11:00

If my Dad can come back from the brink of death, with brain damage, and only have a bloody limp, then I sure as fuck can keep pedalling when my legs want to fall off, and push that weight one more time, and give up chocolate. Hackworthy's are bloody hard to kill and we don't quit.

I will be proof of that.

Todays weight 75.4.

Week 6

2009-10-01T17:34:00.003+10:00

So we're into week 6 of the challenge. Not quite at the end. Halfway mark is on Saturday.

So, to recap, started at 82.3. Last 'official' weigh in was 76.5. So in 5 weeks that's a loss of 5.8kg. Not too bad. I've clocked up 3 losses of around 2 kg, and stayed flat for 2 weeks. Those weeks being the conference, and the week before my last weigh in.

Which is not really my bad. Honestly. I went home to visit Dad and was working my butt off. I had tuna and vita weats at Maccas on every stop along the way. Not that I stopped a whole lot. And I went running/walking every day. I made my own chicken salads. Which was kinda hard in the face of the feast that Mum served the last night. Lasagne. Potatoes. Salad. Wine. And a fucking gorgeous cheese and tomato twist from bakers delight. Stupid me went and picked my favourite bread for dinner. I swear I can eat half of one of those all by myself. Annny way. I made myself a lovely chicken salad. And I really did enjoy it.

My downfall was the chocolate. Damn the chocolate. Earlier that day Mum and I had been to factory sales and they had Enerst Hillier choc coated fruit and nuts for $2/500g. I bought 2 packs and Mum bought 1. Mum opened up her pack and I was picking at it. Rather than take a few here and there I'd have a small handfull, walk away, and come back 20-30 min later for another one.

Weigh in was the next day, in the PM. I was dehydrated and had just been in the car for about 8 hours. So not really sure how that afected the weigh in.

Work outs have been good. I'm taking a much needed day off the gym. Did an epic session on Sunday (2.5hr) and have been killing myself at the gym ever since. Getting less painful each session. Had legs with Simon last night. So now my butt is extra sore. I guess I'm gonna have to get used to this. *sigh* But its worth it in the long run. I did sumo squats last night. I half half of my body weight on my shoulders. Just cuz I could. And then Belgian Split lunges. With 30 kg weights. I'm surprised I can even stand to sit.

I've also started doing protein shakes as I leave the gym. I have 2 proteins. One is good. Tastes like a coffee milkshake without milk. The other is not so good. Tastes like talcum powder in water with a vague chocolate flavour. I've also started having L-carnitine to assist recovery. 1 gram split pre and post workout. Strangely, its since I've started doing this that I feel sorer. Mayhap I'm just working harder.

Diet is going well. I am cutting back on carbs where I can. www.calorieking.com.au is a fantastic resource. Gives me a complete calorie breakdown of what I've eaten. I'm switching away from my museli in the morning, to rolled oats, protein and berries and cinnamon. Gotta give the cardboard some flavour.

AND I've changed around my snacks slightly. I used to eat an apple as I left work, and then some vita weats when I got home, pre gym. Now I eat the apple as I get off the train and head straight to the gym. Bonus! Means I get there earlier and I can save myself some time at night. Me likey.
One other diet change - my last snack of the day is a boiled egg. My diet is too low in fat, so having a little bit, with no carb, at the end of the day is the smartest choice for me. Much better than low calorie fruit yoghurt.

Conference

2009-09-14T20:25:00.005+10:00

Ok. So its been a big few weeks for me. I ended up heading to NZ for work. Conference. And in all of its fully catered glory, I still managed to diet. Sort of.

First day I headed out to the supermarket to stock up on muesli, tuna and vita weats. Diet staples. I also found NZ has canned chicken. Low fat. Phwoar! I thought, 'Aus has seriously gotta jump on that bandwagon'. Until I tried it! Salty and with no texture. Seriously, Aus is better off without the canned chicken.

That first day was tough. I got up at 6.45 and snuck off to the gym. That's 4.45 by my body clock. Then a quick shopping trip, breakfast, and off to seminars. For a full day. They catered morning tea (pastries, from memory), and lunch. No idea what it was, I tended to avoid food times and head back to my room to eat. After the conference (8 long, loong hours later) I was knackered. And they bought out cheese. Blue cheese, foot cheese, brie, crackers, and free alcohol.

I ran.

Had a freakout in my room, then decided I wasn't going to let the situation get the best of me. I had some strawberries and headed back up to mingle.

Then dinner that night was impossible. Curried sausages, lasagne, and some kind of greasy chicken drumsticks, potato salad, tomato and rocket. No vego option. I asked the *cute* bar tender if there was one, and he told me the chef offered to make me pasta.

I left. In tears. It was really hard. All this free alcohol, right in my face. Tired, hungry. I just wanted to sleep. But ultimately I wanted this. I wanted to take myself out of my comfort zone. How else does one grow as a person? I went to the bar and got some type of salad with cheese. Totally not diet, but better than what was on offer.Ironic seeing as I'd avoided the cheese so hard that afternoon.

Next day I decided to check up on the menu prior to the dinner. Steak and veges. Not too bad. I'd decided not to have the dessert. Until it came out. Try saying no to that.

And then I saw the alternative. And I got ridiculously excited.

Clearly, I had the alternative. And it was great!

Overall, I tried my best in NZ. I ate diet where possible, and good where diet was not. I went to the gym at the hotel three times (cardio & body weights). Sweated and grunted and groaned all the way. But I did it. The gym had an AWESOME view of wellington harbour.

And the days where I wasn't sweating it out in front of this view, I was walking around being all touristy.

Overall, I did quite well. When I jumped on the scales the night after I got back I was 80.9. Considering I don't really count any weigh in after lunch I was quite happy.

Busted my arse all last week at the gym. Diet is just sooo much easier to keep when you're in a routine. I was hoping to crack 80 this week. So imagine my shock when I weighed in at 78.7. Yup. Lightest weight ever! I don't think I'm going to get sick of saying that.

So far with the 12 week challenge (3 weeks in) I've lost 3.7kg.

Breaking it down

2009-09-10T21:54:00.003+10:00

I know I've been away for a whole week, and I will post about it, at some stage. When I get around to it. But I've just walked out of a seminar at the gym and I need to clear my head and tally up some numbers. This is my basic dietary breakdown.

Today:
Cal:1156. Fat:21.1 (17%). Pro:73.7 (26%) Carb:166 (58%)

Yesterday
Cal:1266. Fat:28.5 (21%) Pro:84.6 (27%) Carb:159.6 (52%)

Tues:
Cal:1172. Fat:18.8. Pro:82.2 Carb:168.5

Mon:
Cal 1338. Fat: 27.7 Pro: 110.3 Carb: 155.8

Thurs:
Cal 1265. Fat: 23 Pro: 84.3 Carb: 175.7

Average
Cal: 1239.4
Fat: 23.8
Pro: 87
Carb: 165.1

Quick update-age: (UPDATED)

2009-09-04T01:13:00.004+10:00

Just wanted to say:

I BOUGHT SIZE 16 JEANS TODAY!
I got my usual "bootcut" style
BUT
I also got the "slim" style and I tried the 18s on first and they were TOO DAMN BIG!
OMG! SIZE 16!!!!

*MissE does the happy dance all the way out of the lounge room and into bed! Seriously contemplates sleeping with the new jeans... but decides not to because she plans on wearing them tomorrow.*

Update:
Here's me in one of my new pairs of jeans:
Not the greatest shot ever (Mum's a bit of a technophobe and doesn't do so well with the mobile phone/camera), but you get an idea (I hope) of how the jeans look.

Big week

2009-08-30T16:58:00.004+10:00

So I've had quite a big week this week. Starting the challenge, starting a new diet/exercise regime, being sick and having a friend up for a visit. The first few days were ok. Getting into the diet was much easier when I was in the routine of work. I lost 1.1 on Friday when I headed in for a training session.

Friday was... impossible. I don't know if I can put into words what a struggle it was. Everywhere I turned there was someone eating icecream, or chocolate. I was tired, and hungry. Lunch was an ordeal. I wanted grilled fish, no potatoes, with salad. The waiter wouldn't let me do it. I had to order the salad separately. It came out loaded with oily dressing. Kez sent it back. Had to pick the best thing out of food court menu for a snack in the arvo. I chose the natural yoghurt with berries. It was actually a really tough decision, because I didn't think fruit would be filling enough. And I drank epic loads of coffee. Which was good cuz we used it as an excuse to sit down and watch the slappers, hotties and druggies of Kings Cross go by. I was exhausted by the end of it. Considering that was at 2 am, there's no real surprise there. I estimated that I walked 7-9km during the day, on top of training in the morning.

Next day, being yesterday, we headed out to Jenolan Caves. I seriously heart that place. It was slightly easier to diet there. I picked up a noice salad before we left, and took up some tuna with me. Plenty of fruit and water too. And several naps in the car. We did 2 tours, and a 'little' bushwalk. By little, I mean it was not a lengthy duration, and it was on a path. But that path was all stairs mofo. Up. All the freaking way.

Today I headed back towards the gym. In the past 2 days I'd dropped another kg. A full kg. That's 2.1kg in a week. No wonder I'm bloody tired! It was a good effort, especially since I'm heading away tomorrow and no knowing how I'll be there. But I really couldn't keep up loss like that for 12 weeks.

So. Official weigh in 80.3kg.

First Seminar

2009-08-24T21:43:00.002+10:00

So today I had my first group seminar with the challenge. It was ok. I've studied nutrition at uni, so the basic introduction they gave us was a bit boring. But it was good to learn a few tips which will help with the diet.

A few moments of laughter. At people, not with them, which is so much more satisfying. One guy asked if he should give up coffee. When asked how many he had per day, and how many sugars, he replied 'three with three'. FARK. 9 sugars a day. What a waste of kilojoules! When told he should cut down, he asked 'can I have a caramel latte instead?' Fail.

The trainer was going through the signs of overtraining. He mentioned that it can interfere with a 'woman's cycle'. There were boys in the room. Then he mentioned something about a decrease in a mans libido. One guy asked if that was the thing on top of his kidneys. Um, no. That's your adrenal glands. Then someone told him what it was, and the comment echoed around the room - 'sex drive? I got no problems with my sex drive. My sex drive is really high. Really high'. I wonder if that's cuz he can't get any.

Adjusting to a new diet on a weekend is a bitch. I do have to eat a hell of a lot more earlier in the day to compensate for the fact that I use more energy earlier. I gave myself a headache on Saturday; was ok (just a little flat and tired) yesterday; and coped really well today. Its easier to adjust when you have a routine to keep you occupied.

Tomorrow I have lunch with the CEO of my company. Bugger. He's taking our whole department out to get to know us. And I'm gonna be the girl who refuses to eat anything but water. *sigh* I'm going to give it a go. Lunch is a little earlier than I'm used to eating, so I can easily resist the temptation, and have my tuna and vita weats afterwards. We'll see how it goes.

It begins...

2009-08-22T14:03:00.004+10:00

Well, it has started. THE 12 Week Challenge. Weigh in, photos and measurements today. Weight was 82.4. Up a fraction on last week, but I'm still happy with it. When my account is all finalised online, I'll grab the measurements and post them here.

I've been so psyched to do this. Over the past 2 weeks I've been getting ready. I bought heaps of meat (chicken, kangaroo, fish, beef) and weighed it all out into 100g bags. Some of it got chopped up and marinated with herbs/sauces. So they're all ready to go. I made a playlist on my mp3 player that I never use. For running when the gym music is a bit dodgy. And I've wanted to listen to it ever since I made it. Been dying to listen to it, but I refuse.

I was so excited to start the challenge this morning, that I woke up at 6:30, wondering if it was time for me to get up and start my day. Being measured was an interesting experience. I'm very ticklish. When she was measuring my belly with the calipers, I was giggling, then she'd giggle, then I'd giggle some more. Then I'd relax (cuz you need to be to have the measurements done properly), and then she'd accidentally wiggle the calipers, and I'd be off again. They also took blood pressure (mine was a bit high) and heart rate. My resting heart rate is 60! A year ago, when I initially joined the gym, it was 90.

I had a session with Simon today. Then on to cardio machines (playlist rocks) for 10 more minutes running, and some cross trainer action. Then a cool down. I'm doing 2 sessions with him a week for the duration of the challenge.

Then I hit the shops. Needed laundry liquid to wash mah clothes. And I realised, just how tough this challenge was going to be. Normally, when I leave the gym on weekends, I have a boost smoothie and a grilled meat/vege wrap of some description. Not anymore. Normally where I'd head down the choccie isle, for a peruse (I very rarely buy), I had to remind myself not to. Walking past the bread - 'Can't buy that anymore'. Cherry Ripes on special? Nup, cannot has. Light and Tasty cereal? Forget it. Going to stick with my muesli. I was really struck by all these things that I can't even look at. Its called a challenge for a good reason.

From now on, this blog will be a pretty much daily record of how I'm going. I'll try not to do exercise regimes/food consumption posts, its more for things I find challenging and the rewards that will get me through on the tough days.

A year on...

2009-08-14T21:29:00.003+10:00

So its been a year since I joined the gym. I remember my inital goal was to lose 15kg by new year. I have lost 13. 7kg in that time. I'm still happy with that result.

I can run now. Both fast sprints and sustained jogs.

I have bones. And muscle.

I continue to buy fucking white shirts, and dye my hair red. Which results in pink stains all over the neckline of the shirt.

And I have just joined a 12 week challenge at my gym. Its through all of the franchise throughout Aus. I am aiming for national prize. I don't care about the money. I want the satisfaction of doing it. Its gonna be sooo tough. I'm going to train more often. Probably twice a week. And really, really watch my diet.

Rough meal plan:
1 cup museli for brekky. With skim milk and berries/banana/shredded apple.
tub low fat yoghurt for snack
tuna and vita wheats for lunch.
apple when I leave work
vita wheats with a small amount cheese/lf philly (pre gym)
100-150g lean meat with salad or fresh/steamed veges.
tub yoghurt/bit of fruit if still hungy.
2 squares chocolate as a reward if I get through the day.

Challenge starts in a week. Game on!

I've got a new fave number...

2009-08-11T19:27:00.000+10:00

101kg.

I'm sure I'll stop smiling soon.

Cracked!!!

2009-07-25T14:29:00.004+10:00

I'd finally given up all ideas of cracking 83 kg. I'd hovered around 83/84 all year. Bastard weight was going up and down like a freaking yoyo. And I was getting seriously bored with cardio. ITs only taken me a year. So I decided to be more serious about weights and just going in and enjoying myself. And look what happened.

12/07/09: 83.8kg
18/07/09: 84.8kg
25/07/09: 82.8kg

Yep. I've finally done it. Lightest weight ever.

Then and Now... with MissE (updated 25th August)

2009-07-14T16:03:00.008+10:00

Hey there peeps.

This is me - taken in late 2006. I had already gotten rid of at least 10-15kg by this point and was participating in my school's "Staff Biggest Loser" competition.This is me - yesterday. What I really need to do is get dressed in the same clothes as I'm wearing in that "then" photo so I can really see the difference. But this will have to do for the moment. So nearly three years on, this is where I am at... at least 12kg lighter again. And another 20kg to go. But I'll get there.

Update: Here's me in that polo shirt. This is it just hanging loose on me.
Here is me pulling it in to show the difference (or something like that) followed by a shot to show how much extra material there is in this top now.

Wow.

2009-06-27T14:12:00.003+10:00

Just. Wow. Last weeks weigh in was 83.7. My best weigh in to date has been 83.1. right before Easter. Then it was 83.2. Right before Dad got sick. I'm so close to beating it I can practically smell it. So I worked with that goal in mind, all week. I have been sick though, so couldn't really work as hard as I'd wanted too (intense exercise makes breathing kind of hard).

I felt good as I stepped on the scales. I didn't meet my goal, but it didn't wipe the smile off my face. I was 0.2kg above my lowest recorded weight. 83.3kg.

Starting on the treadmill I felt really good. I decided that since I was feeling better, today was the day for me to beat my personal best with running - 13.2km/hr. I was moving quite freely on the treadmill and moving up by 0.6km/hr increments every 20 seconds (instead of my usual 0.5 every 30), and I managed to hit 13.4km/hr. New personal best. Then I walked for the remainder of my treddy time, at a hell of an incline.

But the best bit of all - I am now in my size 14 jeans! That's been my goal since I put on the size 16s. Granted, there is a degree of muffin top, but the right top disguises it completely.

Has epic happy.

Um...

2009-06-19T21:00:00.003+10:00

I discovered last night that I can do a titty dance. Where I flex my pecs and make them move independantly.

Time to stop chest work I think.

Oh my...

2009-06-17T15:06:00.002+10:00

So I just went into JeansWest at the local shopping asylum and tried on what I think of in my head as my "proof of size" jeans. Which I'm aware is prolly a flawed way of looking at them but meh.

Anyway, the point is this... back in May I had to buy the POS jeans in a size 18 because the size 20s that I'd bought last year were literally falling off me. The thing is that the size 18s are starting to approach this same problem. I can now remove them without undoing the button or unzipping the zipper. (Yay, right)

So I figured I might as well go into the store and risk trying on the size 16s in the bootcut jeans that are (admittedly) the slightly looser cut but who the hell cares cos it ain't like they're "large girl" jeans. And guess what?

I CAN FIT INTO THE SIZE 16 JEANS!!! I can do up the button, zip up the zipper and still breathe and not feel like I"m about to get sawed in half in the process!

OH. MY. GAWD!

The happy dance in my head went into overdrive.

And now I have netball training to get to - so MWAH!

Tooting my own horn!

2009-06-11T15:18:00.007+10:00

So my trainer asked me to send him some before and after shots of me. I'm going on the gyms PT wall of fame. So I picked the following photos. The first is obvious - me at graduation. The second is me just before I joined the gym. The third was taken last night. And I gotta say - I didn't realise the difference between the second and third pics. I got a bit of a 'wow' factor when I saw that one.

So, without further ado, I present - my own horn toot!

I never used to have a problem with my weight. I knew I was big, but I'd always been that way, so it was kind of normal for me. I was an obese child. When I graduated from high school I estimate I was 150kg, size 26 jeans. I stayed big through uni, but after I left I started losing weight gradually. Mostly by eating healthier. I impulse bought a rowing machine with the intent to use it, but the novelty wore off and it sat in the corner for about 2 months. After my grandfather died I decided that instead of drinking to deal with it, I'd use the rowing machine as a distraction. I lost a further 20kg in about 4 months. It was then that I decided to really concentrate on losing weight. I kept going for a little bit, and then I hit a plateau. After a while of this I ended up joining the gym. With a lot of hard work, lots of little goals and the help/encouragement of the best trainer I've ever had, I've managed to lose another 13kg, and 2 jeans sizes. I feel so much better now days. I sleep better, am a lot more relaxed, and am miles healthier. I don't get sick as often as I used to, and I have a lot more energy. I still have a way to go, but when I compare what I used to be like, life as a whole is just better, I'm a lot happier. They say ignorance is bliss. Back then it was. Now I realise ignorance is just ignorance.

Update-age from MissE

2009-06-04T11:40:00.003+10:00

Saw that phish had posted and felt a bit guilty... so here's the quick update from me.
According to the WiiFit that I set up for my Mum yesterday, I am currently 105.5kg. This is .5kg less than I was last Friday at the Doctor's... so yay. Mind you, it also told me I'm still considered obese and that my BMI is woefully high. God knows what it would have thought if I'd stepped on at the start of all of this slow and steady weight loss... when I was somewhere beyond 130kg and looking seriously at the size 24 clothes in the "You're Big and We Know It" section of Target.

But now, I'm wearing size 18 jeans from Jeanswest. I can fit into the L size at Crossroads, instead of just getting into the XXL. And more and more of the clothes in my cupboards at getting looser and looser and looser. My fave "loose" item currently is the pair of "Basque Woman" pants that I bought early last year. They're a size 18 and when I bought them they were a little bit tight. And then for the bulk of the year, I put on a little bit of weight and I couldn't get into them comfortably at all. Well, not anymore. I've actually had to use the two little waistband "tighteners" so that I can keep wearing them for work purposes. ;oP

I'm still not going to the gym, coz I still can't afford it. :o(
But I am playing mixed indoor netball every Sunday and going for walk/jogs when I can. Come next week, there'll also be a weekly netball training session coz our team wants to improve... we've lost all bar two of our games so far and some of those losses have been serious floggings.

So bring on the current goal of under 100kg by Christmas. I know it seems a small drop from where I am now but taking it slow and steady is what is working for me. Setting a reasonable and small goal means I don't feel over-pressured and that is what can trigger stupid eating decisions and excessive couch potato-ing.

Later!

Weight Updates

2009-05-31T16:02:00.004+10:00

Ok, so I haven't updated in AGES. Sorry. M'bad. So to recap, in my last update, I'd been staying pretty solid at about 83-84. And that hadn't changed up until Easter.

I had a really good Easter. Went away with fam and went off diet. I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Chocolate, pies, cheese, bacon. Yep. I wanted so I ate. And naturally my weight went up. But it was worth it. From 83.1 to 85.1 in 2 weeks. It gave me a kick in the pants to get serious about losing weight again.

So I did. I worked hard, dieted hard, and lost 1.2kg in one week. I decided to take it easy for a week, and lost 0.7kg. I was all set to work really hard the third week, was getting some fantastic workouts at the gym and then...

IT happened. I got the call that Dad was dying. Naturally I flew down to Victoria immediately. Luckily, Dad pulled through, but my diet didn't. Two road trips to and from Victoria in 3 weeks. Time with the fam. Eating inconsistently. One moment I'd be denying myself roast pork, cauli/cheese sauce and gravy. The next I'd be guzzling a sugary fruit smoothie. My family got irritated, but eventually learned not to buy me food. I did do stair runs on the first time down, with squats/lunges/star jumps, and the second time I did get to the gym twice, but it wasn't enough.

Cue a raise of 3.5kg in 3 weeks.

*GULP*

So I've been working really hard since I've been back.I missed 2 sessions while I was away, so for the last and the coming week, I get 2 PT sessions per week. My trainer has been great I told him that I'd put on weight and he was working me really hard. And this week I lost 1.9kg. I will work equally hard this week.

Recipes

2009-05-30T18:20:00.002+10:00

BLUEBERRY, YOGHURT & OAT MUFFINS
1 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup skim milk
375 ml greek/natural yoghurt
1 2/3 wholemeal SR flour
1/2 tsp bicarb soda
3/4 cup packed brown sugar
2 tablespoons vegetable oil,
dash of lemon
1 teaspoon salt
2 lightly beaten large eggs
1 tin blueberries

Moisten oats with milk and mix with 125g low fat greek or natural yoghurt. Refrigerate for a few hours/overnight.

Preheat oven to 180C.

Combine yoghurt and oat mix with all ingredients, except bluberries. Mix until smooth.

Drain blueberries and fold into mix. Spoon into muffin cases. Bake until muffins spring back when touched lightly in centre.

Eat. Preferably cooling them if you can wait.

WHOLEMEAL FRUIT SCONES
1 2/3 cups wholemeal SR flour
1/3 cup skim milk
1 tbs olive oil
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp cinnamon
About a tsp of sesame seeds
2 small grated red apples
Sml handful of sultanas/ chopped dates
Pinch of salt

Combine all ingredients. Flour bench top and knead dough onto it. Roll out with floured rolling pin and cut with a round cookie cutter* or cut with knife.

Bake at 180C until cooked. Eat.

*an appropriately sized cup will do the same thing.

Damn.

2009-03-22T10:17:00.003+11:00

For pretty much this whole year I've been hovering around the 83.5-84 mark. Its really starting to shit me. I mean, REALLY starting to absolutely shit me. I really want to see that I'm below 80. I've never seen it. I wanted to be there at the end of Feb, and I'm eyeballing the end of March, unchanged. Damnit.

So this week I pledge - no cookie for morning tea. I will have a tiny serve of museli, or fruit, or yoghurt. No avocado. No burgers (even if they are low fat and packed with salad). No museli bars. Unless that's it for a snack. I will shift some of that flub.

Also, I'm switching one night of cardio for some extra weights.

Wish me luck...

checking in...

2009-03-21T10:56:00.003+11:00

So I've been silent again.
I've had to drop the gym due to lack of money.
but I've been trying to walk a lot to make up for it.

weighed myself on Mum's not-100%-reliable scales.
figure I'm around 112kg.
which means I have to have lost (since the beginning of 2006) over 20kgs.
And I should say "got rid of" because "lost" implies I plan on finding those kilos again some day.
And I don't.
Ever.

Hopefully, I will be back in the money-earning people after July. Then it will be back to the gym and full on towards being under 100kg by New Year's.

Phish is my inspiration.

Sick

2009-03-15T09:58:00.003+11:00

But its a good thing. I haven't been to the gym in the past few days. No point. I'm sick. Which means no official weigh in.

But the unofficial weigh in is 81kg, wearing jeans, on my home scales. woot!

I has a happy!

2009-03-01T13:27:00.003+11:00

So I'm down to 83.4 this week. Damn, the scales have been all over the place the last few weeks. Up and down more frequently than a freaking yo yo. But I'm back to weekly PT. Which I love.

But aside from the weight obsession... I got the all clear at the dentist yesterday, and the all clear from the optometrist today. And I was wearing the Jeans Challenge jeans, which had very little discernible muffin top. So I'm feeling pretty darned good, let me tell you.

I have a new pair of jeans to challenge myself with. But I'll wait til next week to begin that one. Right now I'm happy with my accomplishments.

And its measurement day...
01/03/09
Waist: 94cm (down 3)
Hips: 105cm (down 6)
Thighs R/L: 57cm/59cm (up 3cm total)
Arms R/L: 25cm/25cm (unchanged)

The scales are LYING!!!

2009-02-21T15:19:00.007+11:00

Fucking bastard scales. Apparently I put on 1kg this week. Which is bullshit. Admittedly, yes, I did do a PMS dietary disaster (chips, magnum ego, chocolate mousse), and a big protein laden dinner last night, but I still did some really good work outs. And that chocolate mousse was so worth every single one of its 1900kj. And the reason I think the scales are lying...

Jeans Buttons: 5/5
Muffin top factor: Camouflagable.

I have pics, but I'm not going to post them. For a start it looks like I have camel toe, and the other is that they do actually show the muffin top, and what it looks like covered. In a shapeless cami.

So, all I can do is weigh myself again tomorrow and hope that the scales are a touch more honest this time.

2 week update

2009-02-15T17:08:00.003+11:00

The past two weeks have been a little odd for me. I had a few dates, so didn't get to go to the gym. Then there was the heat wave, in which I flat refused to go to the gym. So a whole week off the gym. And in that time I wasn't strictly dieting. I wasn't out of control, but I was ok with having chicken burgers with bacon.

And you know what, I LOVED it.

But I missed the wiegh in last week.

This week has been a bit more work, but only 3 gym sessions. And a weigh in... very close to my last recorded. So I'm actually ok with it.

This week I'm 83.9kg. I don't think I'll be under 80 kg by the end of Feb.

Jeans Buttons: 5/5
Muffin top factor: Out there.

Been a while...

2009-02-07T22:29:00.006+11:00

Sorry about that... but I have been distracted and not as focussed as I could be.

Basically I just wanted to give people an idea of where I've come from weight wise.

This was me at my 30 birthday - so four years ago:
I figure that I likely weighed well over 130kgs at this point and likely got bigger in the follow year before I began to actively look at how I was living my life and what I was doing to my body.

This is me now - I took it on Thursday and it is also posted over at my blog:
I would like to have had a picture in a similar pose the one above but this is the best I can find at the moment. Mind you, there is no way that the woman in that top photo would have even considered wearing the outfit that the woman in the bottom photo has on.

Currently I weigh somewhere in the vicinity of 115kgs but my plan is to be below the 100 mark by year's end. If my Personal Trainer has her way, I'll get to that mark before August. But the universe has been conspiring against my workouts lately - the heatwave here in Adelaide was just too much. But we've a cool change in the wind so next week is back to it!

Later.

2009-02-01T14:45:00.003+11:00

Today's weigh in was a little strange.

I normally weigh myself pre-exercise in the morning. But today I weighed myself at the end of my cardio set. Out of curiosity, I have previously learnt that I will put on weight during exercise (all the H20 I drink). First the scales told me 83.0 (woot) then in the space of 3 seconds, they went to 83.5. Humm.

So I'm confused. Do I put down as 83.0, or 83.5. Or do I go for middle ground?

2009-01-25T16:15:00.001+11:00

Todays weight is 83.9kg. I want to be below 80 kg by the end of Feb. Should be easy enough.

Jeans Buttons: 5/5
Muffin top factor: Out there.

Back on track

2009-01-18T14:53:00.003+11:00

So I'm getting back on track. Todays weigh in was almost at my pre Christmas level*. I've kicked my compulsive chocolate eating, and am back to regular chocolate eating. I've begun personal training again. And its given me a pschological boost to want to keep going to the gym. I've decided to go back to weekly training, as soon as finances work themselves out.

Jeans Buttons: 5/5
Muffin top factor: Out there.

*which is fantastic, considering I've been on very potent pain killers for a tooth ache, and what's been going in hasn't been coming out.

Weight gain again

2009-01-04T12:38:00.002+11:00

And yet I can do up another button on the jeans. Go figure. I may have to jump on the scales again today.

I ate way too much chocolate in the past two weeks, so I decided that yesterday I wouldn't have any. It was hell. I was a grumpy fucker, but I managed. I got a bit inventive when I wanted sugary bits. A low fat muffin, and later on low fat frozen yoghurt. Hell, I even refused to have a chocolate shake. Other than that, nothing really big to report.

Oh, I am regularly running at 10k an hour, for short bursts.

Jeans Buttons: 4/5
Muffin top factor: Extreme.

Post Christmas lard arse-ed-ness

2008-12-27T21:25:00.004+11:00

Well, as expected, I put on weight this week. Boo. I estimate about a kilo. I weighed myself late in the arvo, where I normally weigh in the morning, and I have premenstrual bloating. So I can factor off some of the number.

But jeez! A kilo in a few days...

I haven't been to the gym since last Sunday. Monday/Tuesday I was feeling off (read:lazy), Wed arvo, Thurs and Fri it was shut. 5 days without a sweat. I knew I'd be up for a big session today before I even went in. But when I weighed myself I was so disappointed that I couldn't even register what the decimal measurement was. Hence the weight in the sidebar being listed as 86.?kg. I did a full on cardio session - walk/run for 10 minutes, then 10 minutes cross trainer, 10 minutes rowing machine (with break after 5 min), 10 minutes bike, then another 10 minutes walk/running intervals. Then onto weights. I did 9 machines, 3 sets of 10 to 15 reps, at uncomfortable but completable weights. The whole deal took 2 hours and I was shaking as I walked out of the gym.

Now I'm tired, and sore. I'm ready for bed.

I also have myself a new challenge. I have managed to acquire a pair of jeans that is a size 16. They dont quite go up all the way, but beginning this week I'll be keeping tabs on how far up those puppies go, and hopefully before long I'll be wearing them. Nothing quite like having a goal to work for.

Jeans Buttons: 3/5
Muffin top factor: Extreme.

2008-12-20T21:23:00.002+11:00

Again, not much to report. 84.3kg today. That's a total loss of 12.3kg to date. Best Christmas present. EVAH!

But with Christmas coming up I'm not expecting to be losing much this week. I've had 2 Christmas parties last week, and I managed to do quite well with them. One more to go. I've already picked what I'm having. Thai beef salad. Lettuce = good.

I've been quite slack the last few days. Well, when I say slack I mean I've had more give in my diet. I am trying not to focus so much on weight loss at the moment. It is still a priority, but its not an obsession. I have worms. Have had them for months now. And I've been treating it like a good thing. That's a bit OTT and not really healthy. I'm trying to change that, but its a bit of a battle. I don't really have much else to focus on right now, and this attitude is so ingrained it is going to be hard to kick.

85.7kg.

2008-12-06T14:58:00.003+11:00

Nothing big to report this week. Except I jogged on the treadmill today. First time ever. It was a slow jog, only for 2 minutes and I felt as awkward as ass. I'm not used to the treadmill, but its a baby step.

Goal!

2008-11-29T15:03:00.004+11:00

Well, I've lost 10kg. Yay me! I haven't really done the shake thing this week, and I've still lost weight, so its comforting to know that I can maintain weight loss even when I'm eating solid food.

Most times this week I ate under sufferance. I cooked a massive meal last weekend with the intention of having it for lunches. Only to desire shakes for lunch instead. Much frustration ensued, and I persevered with the meals because I didn't want to waste food.

So even after pretty much coming off the shake diet, I've been able to continue losing weight. Though I think I'll keep on that diet. Four and a half weeks to lose 5 kg.

Wish me luck.

2008-11-16T11:55:00.004+11:00

Well the new diet does seem to be working. The past 3 weeks has seen weight loss of 3.8 kg (8lb). I'm still sticking with the gym, and still doing my own meal plan. It does have some gastric issues. And by that I mean I get some uncomfortable stomach cramps at the gym, and I'm always guessing as to when I'm going to poop, and what its going to be like.

Apart from that, I think this diet is doing pretty well. For the past 5 months I've had no sex drive. Sad but oh, so very true. I figure that was initially a result of work stress, and then as I moved into the new job and started hardcore dieting, it was put down to massive energy deficit. Well, on the new diet, even though I'm still losing masses of weight, the sex drive has come back. With a vengeance.

So I said I'd upload pics too. Well, here they are. They're not pretty.

Start date: 08 August 09
Weight: 96.4kg , 212 lb
Waist: 111cm
Hips: 127cm
Thighs R/L: 64cm/66cm
Arms R/L: 32cm/33cm

Midway: 16 November 09
Weight:87.7kg, 193 lb
Waist: 96cm
Hips: 111cm
Thighs R/L: 61cm/63cm
Arms R/L: 34cm/31cm
I would also like to point out that this is officially the smallest I've ever been in my adult life.

I'm still here though.

2008-11-08T17:10:00.001+11:00

So I have no bloggy mojo right now, but I still have weight loss mojo, which equates to being able to post here.

I'm only down 0.3 kg this week, but there was cake. Four times. *sigh* too many birthdays this week. I'm still on the shakes. They work. But more importantly, they're bloody easy to make, so when I don't want to cook... there they are. I've had a shake for each of the past 5 meals. And I'll probably have one for dinner too.

i'll eat solid food tomorrow. I swear.

Shakes.

2008-10-30T21:16:00.005+11:00

Much excitement to be had today. I weighed myself. I've been feeling pretty good all week, after taking a few days to adjust to the new diet. And the scales told me I've lost 1.5 kg since Saturday.

WOW!!!

Yay fucking me!

So, a quick rundown on the diet.

I'm doing celebrity slim. I didn't like the meal plan. So I tweaked it. Mostly because people lose weight on that diet without exercising, and I wasn't giving up my exercise. Did I say 'tweak'? I means to say 'I ripped it apart and made a new one'.

So the recommended diet is

one shake for breakfast
a low carb, low fat snack
one shake for lunch
a low carb, low fat snack
a 'balanced' dinner (read: chicken/other lean meat and vege)
a low carb, low fat snack.

But no fruit (small apples, small oranges, half a mango, half a cup of berries, pears and peaches, max 3 servings of each per week), no carbs (cereal bread, rice, pasta), max 6 eggs a week.

Now, I can do snacks. I love snacks. That type of eating plan is what I live for. But I can't do the no fruit and no cereal thing. Especially since I went out and bought a stack of fruit that was on the 'naughty list', and 2 boxes of breakfast cereal. Plus I figured that since I was exercising I needed the extras, I could have them, so long as I was careful.

So what I tend to do is

bowl of cereal for breakfast, with carb blocker and vitamins
museli and yoghurt, or strawberries and yoghurt
salad, chicken and veg, or sammich.
apple on the walk from work to the train station
fruit when I get home (a WHOLE mango or some melon). I need the boost for...
GYM
shake for dinner
maybe some crackers with low fat tzatziki, or reduced fat avo dip for a snack.

I keep a meal and exercise diary too. It has an easy column to measure how much exercise you've had, how much water you've drunk, and you're fruit/vege intake per day. I drink about 2 litres of water a day. Very easy considering how much I sweat at the gym. And if I go to the gym late I skip the fruit when I get home, and have 'dinner' beforehand.

I should also point out that I have cut back on what I eat too. I used to have a snack as museli/yoghurt and fruit, and a big bowl of fruit salad when I got home from work. But I've dropped that.

The first few days on this diet gave me the most awful headache. And it absolutely fails if you're prone to boredom eating, so this weekend will be quite the test for me. But so far, I'd have to say this one is working quite well. I feel great. I really do.

Hmmm - that's a problem.

2008-10-29T10:09:00.002+11:00

Had a PT session for this morning... upshot is that my trainer, M wants me to get checked out by the doctor coz she is worried about the whole getting dizzy thing. Apparently, it turns out that I'm not as unfit as I think I am and so that means that there might be something else going on.

So I just made an appointment for Saturday.

I'll let you know what happens.

Later.

This might be useful...

2008-10-27T11:47:00.003+11:00

I found this on the "Better Homes and Gardens" pages of Channel 7's Yahoo website and thought it was worth passing on:

If you’ve tried to lose weight, but haven’t succeeded, it may be because your metabolism has slowed down. So, to finally lose those extra kilos, and to keep them off, follow these tips to give your metabolism a boost. And while exercise makes a big difference to your weight loss, you can also burn kilojoules while you rest by watching what and when you eat.
Don’t skip breakfast. The morning meal jump-starts your metabolism and helps prevent bingeing later in the day. A cup of coffee doesn’t count – the added sugar causes a mid-morning slump, making you more likely to overeat later. Morning foods that include complex carbohydrates like whole grains (oatmeal), along with a little protein and low-fat yoghurt and milk, will maintain energy levels and keep your hunger in check.
Eat more often. Get in the habit of eating every 3-4 hours, or at least four times a day. Eating frequently helps stabilise your blood sugar levels, so they don’t plummet and make you want to overeat. Regular meals also help keep your body’s metabolic rate from falling. When you go a long time without nourishment, your body compensates by slowing down to conserve energy, and this can hurt weight-loss efforts.
Opt for protein at every meal. Protein helps reduce your appetite, takes more energy to digest, and also makes you feel full longer than eating carbohydrates alone. And recent studies suggest that eating more protein can help you lose weight – even without reducing the number of kilojoules. Try these easy choices: turkey on whole-wheat bread; hommus and pita; vegetables and chilli; fruit with a handful of nuts; or nutrition bars that contain at least 12 grams of protein.
Hold off on snacking. Many of us grab a snack for quick energy when we’re feeling tired. But don’t confuse fatigue with true hunger. Instead, go for a brisk walk. This will raise your heart rate and give you an energy boost. Follow it up with a big glass of water. If you’re still feeling hungry, opt for a healthy protein-and-carbs snack.
Consume enough for your body’s needs. Eating too little slows your body’s metabolism in the same way that eating infrequently does. If you want to lose weight, don’t slash your kilojoules intake too drastically. Instead, cut out the extras like soft drinks, cakes and sweets. Processed foods can be high in fat and kilojoules, but low in nutritional value, which means excess kilos will be stored as fat.

I know I'm going to be trying to follow the obvious stuff... like cutting back on the sweets and so forth (she says, stuffing another piece of chocolate in her mouth.)

But I'm determined. Things will change. I will do better, eat better, feel better and so on...

Trying somthing new

2008-10-25T15:15:00.003+11:00

I'm trying meal replacement shakes. For one meal per day. The plan prescribes 2 per day, no carbs, and works without exercise. I think that's bullshit because I'm at the gym pretty much daily. I choose to tweak the system, and have the shake for lunch, or for dinner after the gym when I don't feel like cooking.

I had a shake for munch today. And was freaking hungry, so I followed it up with a snack of 4 crackers and a tin of low fat tuna. And a large banana.

We'll see how it goes.

Quick Ramble

2008-10-19T13:44:00.002+11:00

So I haven't posted in a few weeks. My bad! I've been pretty stable the past two weeks, and have dropped a (tiny) bit this last week. But I feel good. Last week I kind of went 'fuckkit' and had a few relaxed diet days. And DAYAM they were good. I had chocolate. A whole Summer Roll to myself, and a pack of Choc Oranges! And sushi (rice = carbs), and salmon (oily fish). Things I would normally have as a treat. I just ate because I could. And I needed a protein hit, so I also had bacon (lean, obviously) and eggs for dinner after the gym one night.

And I only went to the gym four times this week too. Monday's workout was short but intense! It was great. Wednesday I did half a session of cardio and then a body balance class. Thursday was PT. And it left Monday for dead. So I didn't spend as much time working out as I normally would. I must have done about 40% workout time. But it worked. Somehow. And even though I ate crap, I still managed to drop weight.

The highlight of my week - catching a view of my thigh in the mirror as I walked past (obviously nekkid) and going back for a second look. Its beginning to look toned! Its still big, just not as jiggly as it was.

Goal Reached!

2008-10-04T13:43:00.002+10:00

Ok. So in my first post I said there were a few things I wanted. Well, among them was to fit into my old jeans. Appropriately. Well, I'm wearing them now!

I'm going to work extra hard this week and I'm aiming to be at 90 kg by this time next week.

I think I'll be living on soup and salads.

Kangaroo and Veg Broth.

1x pack French onion soup
1x pack chicken noodle soup
500g marinated Kangaroo meat (or beef strips if Roo not available)
1x large onion (2x small)
3x sticks celery (with leaves)
1x capsicum
2x carrots
1x tin baby corn
1x broccoli stalk

Bring 2L of water to boil. Add both packets of soup, Reduce heat to simmer. Dice meat finely and add to water. Add drained corn and coarsely chopped onion, celery, capsicum, broccoli stalk and peeled carrots. Finely chop celery leaves and add to pot as well. Fresh parsley and oregano can also be finely chopped and added for extra flavor.

Simmer until meat is cooked. Add salt and pepper to taste.

Tip: Kangaroo meat is notoriously tough, and very flavorsome. Cooking it in soup tenderizes it, and it gives an amazing flavor to the broth.

Low Fat Creamy Pumpkin Soup

1x large butternut pumpkin
1x pack chicken noodle soup
1x tin low fat coconut milk

Bring approx 2L water to boil and add soup mix. Chop pumpkin into squares. Add to pot. Reduce heat to a slow boil and cover for about an hour, stirring occasionally. Pumpkin will turn to mush as it cooks. When the sop has reached a desired consistency, add coconut milk.

Tip: If desired, double the amount of soup packets and coconut cream. Add a cup of caramelised onion for a sweeter kick.

Le Sigh

2008-09-30T04:01:00.003+10:00

I went out with some friends for lunch yesterday.

To a bakery.

I bought a bunch of things and ate little bites out of them.
3 different types of brownies, a cinnamon bun and a honey cake.

I ate more little bites after dinner last night.

I went to bed and suddenly realized what I had done.

I got out of bed and threw out the box.

I'm So Anal I Need to Plan More...

2008-09-22T12:08:00.003+10:00

So when I quit my job, I made a plan to find a new one.
I had outlines and tasks and goals.
I followed them religiously - because I have to make money to live right?

So apparently what I need to do for this is along the same lines- make a plan.

So my dears- here is what I intend to do:

1. I am considering this: http://www.weightwatchers.ca/index.aspx
It's Weight watchers online. No meetings or crap like that. Just some guidelines for me to follow.

2. I am looking for a dance class and/or pool to go and do laps. I hate the gym. I've joined and quit many times before. But I would cheerfully swim laps for hours. I have to enjoy myself in order to do anything.

3. My Carmen Electra DVD? Yeah, Carmen annoys me - so I ignore it. But I am trying like hell to walk more. And I successfully managed to get past going out and getting Dairy Queen today. Go me!

I think once I have a more concrete plan set out in my mind- other than "yeah, I should do healthier things" in a vague way will generate maybe a few more positive results.

Love you!
xoxo

Dealing with chocolate...

2008-09-21T19:14:00.003+10:00

I can't not eat chocolate. If I have it in the cupboard, I can't stop at a few pieces. And if I don't have it in the cupboard, I'll go out and buy a few bars and eat them in one go. So I've devised a few ways to combat this.

1) I buy dark chocolate. I find I eat it when I want chocolate flavour, rather than when I want a sugar fix, so its easier to stop. It has similar (slightly less) calories to regular chocolate, but smaller amounts are just as satisfying.

2) If I do happen to buy milk chocolate, I break it up into portions, and freeze the whole bloody lot! Its easier to resist the temptation when you have to wait 5 minutes to get your fix.

stalled....

2008-09-21T17:43:00.002+10:00

I made it to the gym Monday.
Had my first go at the programme my PT wrote me.
and then Tuesday arvo came around, my glands swelled up, my throat got all scratchy and I went home via the gym to cancel the PT session Wed morning coz I felt like shite.
Doctor's appointment Friday arvo and I apparently picked up a cold/flu virus somewhere (gosh.. gee whiz where could that have been from?) and am supposed to rest and recuperate... right. So I'll leave off going back until this coming Wednesday when I have anther PT session due.

Wank bugger damn shit crap darn it.

So I have no idea on how much I weigh besides too much... I'm feeling somewhat miffed at myself and at my immune system.

I promise, Phish, that I will come up with something brilliant and inspiring to post as soon as I can.

argh!

*MissE goes of to pound her head on the wall for a while... and feed the cat before he eats her ankles in protest*

Happiness is...

2008-09-20T16:28:00.003+10:00

92.0kg

Fuck! Wank! Bugger! Shitting! Arse! Head and hole...

2008-09-15T21:34:00.002+10:00

Weight gain. Again. Boo.

94.2kg

Bad week

2008-09-09T22:30:00.002+10:00

So I went to the gym Monday.
I did a bit of walking to warm up and then did my weights (added in the bicep curl machine for variety) and finished with some cross trainer.
Ended up rather dizzy and light headed so went and sat down for a while before doing my stretches.

And then I weighed myself.

Talk about a downer... and I don't mean my weight. That was not down at all. That was up 5 fracking kilos is what that was.

I was soooo utterly depressed by those stupid numbers.
And part of me wanted to disappear into the nearest junk food supply and chow down until the year ends.
A completely irrational and stupid response, I know. And one I didn't end up indulging.

But it kinda knocked the wind outta my sails, so to speak. And last week was a bad one - I didn't get to the gym at all after Wednesday. And I ate more than I should have. ARGH! I'm fighting major stresser-triggers for emotional eating at the moment. Stupid work. Stupid uni. But... gym tomorrow. PT with the little blonde nazi... I'll tell her and she'll get me moving.

And my arms really hurt - the muscles on the inside bend of my elbows... talk about OW!

2008-09-08T21:07:00.003+10:00

So I bit the bullet and weighed myself this week. 93.8. Not too bad I guess. Considering last weigh in was early in the morning without eating, and this one was after a full day.

2008-09-07T19:45:00.001+10:00

So I've had a really big last few days. Not going to weigh myself this week. Though I feel kinda gross for eating so crappily.

Gymventures

2008-09-01T21:49:00.003+10:00

I didn't want to go to the gym tonight. I felt like being all lazy. So I made dinner (nommy low fat pizza, I'll share the recipe later this week) and settled in to watch tv.

Only to get restless about 7:30. I couldn't sit still. Gym has become part of my routine and its hard to break, especailly to do nothing. So I went. And I'm glad I did.

I've just gotten back, 1 1/2 hour later. 45 mins cardio, plus weights. I keep a training schedule where I record what I've done in a work out, to monitor progress. I decided to fill mine out tonight.

Cardio workouts are getting longer, levels staying about the same. Except for treadmill, where I'm walking at .8k faster than I was two weeks ago. But pretty much all of them are 'going further' (even though I'm not actually going anywhere) than they were.
I'm also in the process of increasing weights. So I'm doing one set of 15 reps at level 5, and then dropping back to level 4 for my remaining two sets.

On the 'I need a shower scale' of 1 to 5, I'm rating about a 5.2 about now.

TaTa

Cupcakes

2008-09-01T02:40:00.002+10:00

So um hi.
I had a cupcake for breakfast this morning.
I don't even want to weigh myself after the last few days I've had at family reunions and the food. Oh God. All the food.

I feel like a fraud who shouldn't even be contributing to this blog, as I clearly am not even trying. ;(

I'm sorry. I love you all.
I promise that today (post-cupcake) is a brand new day and I am filled with a renewed sense of conviction.

I WILL beat this! I will come up with some sort of exercise regime. And I will attempt to at least try to eat a carrot or something before I resort to cupcakes!

xo

Less of me...

2008-08-31T12:36:00.002+10:00

So, after the evil lunges of Wednesday morning my legs were very very :o(
I didn't get back to the gym until today.
Had planned to go yesterday but was not feeling very well at all.
So I went in today instead.
Warmed up on the treadmill, then did my weight work for around 20-25 minutes, then managed 5 minutes on the treadclimber.
After stretches I went in and weighed myself.

112.1kgs!!
Wooooo hooooo to me!
I've somehow managed to get rid of 1.2kg this week.
I'm sure it's due to my eating less or even eating more regularly with the Lite'n'Easy stuff - you know, now my body has to start eating itself a bit more.
I'm also sure it will not be this easy the whole way down to the 80kg I want to weight by the end of 2009, but it is definitely a nice feeling to have gotten off the 115-116kg mark where I've been for the last 18 months.

RESULT!

2008-08-30T17:23:00.004+10:00

-2.2kg this week. Though I think some of that was off last week and maybe I jumped on the scales with a full stomach or something.

Was running up the stairs a few afternoons ago and felt like my jeans were going to fall off. I guess that's a good thing.

Highlight of my week was yesterday. I had the best lemon sorbet ever. And I didn't go to the gym either. Clearly yesterday was reward day.

2008-08-28T11:43:00.002+10:00

ohhhhh my thighs hurt!!!!

ow ow ow ow ow ow ow.

Lunges are of the devil.

First PT session yesterday morning around 8am.
And now at 11:15am my inner thigh muscles... you know, the ones towards the top of your thigh? Anyway, those ones - HURT!!!

But I'll go back tomorrow after work and get them moving again. Hell, I may even head in this arvo... depends how the housework goes.

First official weight in...

2008-08-25T18:29:00.003+10:00

I procrastinated about this morning.
I don't know why.
I mean, I really wanted to go to the gym.
But I got up late, I faffed about with breakfast and getting into gym gear, so it was nearly 11am before I walked through the gym doors.

I decided to go with a weight training session today. 5 minute warm up on the treadmill and then into the weights area. 2x15 reps on the leg press and the shoulder press plus 1x15 reps on the shoulder pull-down thingy and 1x15 on the compound rowing machine. I figured I should do weights today so tomorrow is just a treadmill type of day and then Wednesday is my first PT morning and that might involve some weights work and you're supposed to have a day "off" between weight work.

The best news though was that at the end of the session I went and weighed myself. I thought I was still around the 115-117kg mark (it's where I've been 'sitting' for the last 18 months or so) but according to the scales I'm currently sitting at around 113.3kg!!!

There were some big smiles on my face!

Sometimes you just start slow...

2008-08-23T23:32:00.002+10:00

I went to the gym on Thursday for my orientation appointment.
I got to "play" on the various machines for cardio work - like rowing machines and cross trainers - and on the variety of weight machines for working leg and arm muscles... hopefully building up lovely lean muscles somewhere down the track.

Haven't been back yet as I was at work all day Friday and came straight home so I could hang out with my sister as she's in town from Perth, and then today I was seriously feeling the rotten cold virus thing that's set up camp in my throat this past week and a bit. That said, I will be heading into the gym tomorrow for a nice 30 minute walk on the treadmill! Definitely. And my once-a-week PT starts on Wednesday morning at 8am, which means I need to be there at least 15 minutes before that to do some warm up walking on the treadmill or maybe on the cross trainer before I meet M and find out just how 'mean' she's going to be. I'm hoping for really really really mean.

And I'll weigh myself then too. See where I'm at...

Not a good week

2008-08-23T15:02:00.003+10:00

This week wasn't as physically tough as last week. I was at the gym most days, and took Thursday off. I shouldn't have. I felt so heavy all day. Friday when I did my weigh in I'd only lost .3 of a kg. Not good, but better than putting weight on I guess.

I didn't have a personal training session this week. PT was sick. I'm going to do my weigh ins the day after training from now on. It would be way too hard to go into a session and give it my best if I am disappointed with my weigh in.

-0.9kg

2008-08-15T20:11:00.003+10:00

So the gym is going quite well. Its been a week and I've been five days, for an hour or so each time.

It was difficult to begin with. I hurt. It was easy to get to sleep but difficult to get up in the morning.

MONDAY:
Went to the gym pretty much straight after work. I felt tired, but good. Attempted to go to dance class after and had an epic fail. I was tripping over my own feet. Decided to drop all but Monday night classes and concentrate on the gym instead. My dance instructor was ok with it. I'm cutting out of a class that's just started, and he doesn't usually let people do that. Had to go home and cook rice for tomorrows dinner and didn't get to bed til late. Absolutely exhausted.

TUESDAY:
Absolutely stuffed all day. Went to gym as per usual. In bed a bit earlier.

WEDNESDAY:
Very difficult to get out of bed this morning. I had chips with lunch. So had to do extra cardio. It hurt and I hated it. I despise the cross trainer and always jump on it first, just to get it out of the way. From here on in, I'll have to weigh up my options - I can have nasties, but only if I do extra cardio. I don't think it will be really worth it most times, so will be an effective deterrent.

The gym seems to becoming a habit. I may not want to walk out the door, but once I have my (gay, dorky) backpack on, its automatic. Plus when I get there its all on autopilot. I'm beginning to see how gym junkies work.

Didn't feel like eating when I got home, but made myself a small meal of peri-peri marinated chicken and steamed broccoli and carrots. Very late to bed. Won't want to get out of bed tomorrow.

THURSDAY:
Out of bed fine today. Must say I was surprised. I think I'm starting to get used to the work out. Had a banana whilst running around getting ready for work, and then some toast when I got to work. My arm hurts most of the day from chest presses. I'm still trying to figure out which weight works best for me. Also good news - no muffin top today!!! Granted it is in yesterdays jeans, so they might have stretched a little.

No gym tonight. I wanted to go, but I know I need to give my body a rest. I feel a little guilty. My other rest day will be Mondays, when I'm at dance class.

In bed by early/normal time.

FRIDAY:
Difficult to get out of bed this morning. But I guess that might be because its Friday and I just want to sleep.

Had a session with the personal trainer tonight. Jumped on the scales pre warm up. Lost 0.0kg. I was a bit disappointed after the amount of work I'd been doing, but as I type this I'm stoked. Did a bit of boxing, some interval training and then sit ups. The sit ups were an epic fail. EPIC. But we were laughing most of the way through, and it was really fun.

One down...

2008-08-15T16:02:00.002+10:00

I did it.

Admittedly it took me two more days than planned but still I have joined my local gym! My membership starts as of tomorrow morning. I went for the membership that gets me a session with a Personal Trainer once a week every week of my 12 months membership. COz I know I need that extra help.

You should see inside this place!
Wow.
Have any of you guys been inside a Fernwood?
Coz... DAMN!
It's sooooo nice.
The change room is so clean and... well, girlie.
And I actually like that it is a women only gym... which is odd coz I thought I wouldn't... you know, no guys to oggle, women being harsh judgemental bitches, and so forth. But I felt really good when I walked in yesterday to have a look and even better when I went back today to sign up!

So now I just need to call Lite'N'Easy.

Later!

So what am I gonna do?

2008-08-12T23:30:00.003+10:00

Well, tomorrow morning I'm calling my local Fernwood gym and getting some price details. Let's be honest - unless it is ridiculously priced, I'm gonna join up. It's just down the road so I won't be able to use the whole "Oh it's too far to drive" excuse.

After I've done that I'm calling "Lite'n'Easy" and organise to get the Breakfast and Lunch setup so then I only have to worry about what I'm eating at dinner as far as healthy for me goes. It means one less stress... and stress is a trigger for me to eat crap food.... sooooooo.

I'm Gonna Miss M & M's

2008-08-12T13:11:00.003+10:00

Ok, the thought of going and weighing myself for this causes me physical pain- which I suppose is why I'm here right?

*Pause while I run to the bathroom scale*

Gawd- 223 lbs. Weird, I'm in a metric country (Canada) but I don't know how to convert that. Anyhow that was crazy depressing.

I think my journey, while wanting to lose weight, is to also love myself regardless of whether or not I ever lose an ounce.

Although the fact that I was handed a slice of chocolate cheesecake when I got to work today - regardless of how nice it was to be thought of, won't really be helping me.

So: I am now bussing to work, which involves a lot more walking to and from bus stops. I also work in a HUGE institution now that involves more stairs and long distances to get to other people's offices/departments. So that should help.

AND, I should also fall in love with my workout DVDs again. I cannot promise the gym, as I hate hate hate it there. Makes me feel crappy about myself.

As for food- maybe more home-made meals, fewer M&M's. It's all about baby steps, right?

Thanks for letting me be a part of this group ladies!

Princess of the Universe
xo

And I'm the other one...

2008-08-10T17:47:00.005+10:00

Go Steph!
Well, I'm going to be a little behind you on getting things going - but I will get them going.
Dunno about joining a gym... I need to have a look at what gyms are around here. I do miss going to the gym; I used to go to one back in Rocko. I've been so slack... I haven't even been going walking with anything resembling regularity.

So my current stats? Hmmm, well, the last time I stepped on a scale was around a month ago and I was around the 115-116kg mark. I don't know my measurements at this point but I'll put them up when I get them, promise.

Oh - and for anyone reading this who isn't Steph ...

Hi, I'm MissE.
Steph kindly invited me to join her on this mission to get ourselves healthy and slimmer than we currently are.
I'm 33 and I'm doing this because I want to feel good about myself. Like Steph, I want guys to check me out, not coz my arse is its own planetoid but because I look 'hot' and fabulous! But mainly I want to not hate myself even a little bit when I lok in the mirror. I want to be able to walk into an ordinary clothing store and not search for the XXL or even the XL... I want rid of the X's!
Currently I am anything from a 16-20 depending on where I am shopping... I mostly shop in the clothes stores that cater for the "big girl" and it kinda sucks because they tend to stock a lot of ugly-fracking clothes.

Anyway - I'll be back soon!

Beginning

2008-08-10T16:20:00.000+10:00

I had my first gym visit on Friday.

Weight: 96.4kg, clothed.

I got all of my measurements done, but I don't have them on me. I'll update the sidebar when I get them.

I had a personal trainer too. He's very easy on the eyes, and seems nice. I don't know if he's going to push me as much as I'd like, but I'm pretty willing, so I guess right now I don't need it. I did end up feeling worn in at the end of my session, and I went back and did another 15min of cardio before I left.

I really liked it and can't wait to get back there.

****
Second visit today. Did it all by myself. I like my gym. It feels quite comfortable. Its big. But its still comfortable. And clean. Which is very important! 20 minutes mixed cardio, a little weights (3x 3 lots of 15 reps), then 20 minutes more cardio.

I was pretty worn in when I left. I could have kept going, but once I stopped I realised I was knackered. 3 hours later and I want to to back again :$

Sugar cravings

2008-08-09T21:42:00.004+10:00

OMG!!! If you're likely to demolish a block of chocolate from sugar cravings, get your butt (or mouse) here.

I picked up some sweet flavoured teas today while in the city. One pot (2 cups) of creme brulee flavoured tea and no more chocolate cravings. I feel full and like I've satisfied my craving. Full of tea goodness too.

Flavours on my WANT list are
Creme Brulee
Red choc mint
Strawberries and cream
Sencha
Honey green almond
Something Rose flavoured
Something vanilla flavoured
Mint mix

I had a sniff of the mint mix, and it smells strong enough to burn the hair out of your nose. YUM

In the beginning

2008-08-08T22:00:00.000+10:00

So here I am. I guess this is the post where I spill my lardy soul. Why do I want to lose weight seems to be the big question. And the big answer is (truthfully) because I'm vain. I have lost a lot of weight in the past. Its a good thing. I know I can do it. But I've stopped. Its a combo of things and I've decided to start again.

I'm doing this for me. I like the feeling of being active. I recently switched jobs and have been sitting behind a desk for the past three weeks. In the beginning it was fine, I was sick and needed to chill out. But now I'm better and I feel like I'm going to POP by mid afternoon.

I don't fit into my jeans anymore.

I'm doing this because I like the feeling of being active. Life just seems... better.

I want to lose weight. That's my aim. My goal is to lose 15kg by new year. A totally manageable goal. Ideally I'd like to lose 20kg, but that is a dream. If I hit 15kg I'll set new goals.

My little goals... I have those. My first goal is to fit into my old jeans. Then I want to fit into them with no muffin top. Then I want to team those jeans with a green singlet that I sooo love, but is tight. That should take me to my pre christmas weight. And its a good start.

From there my immediate goals go in 5kg increments. I want appropriately wear size 16 jeans, and then into size 14 jeans. I don't aspire to size 12. That's too far away right now and would be easy to lose sight of.

I want to turn heads when I go past. I want guys to notice me. Not because I want them, but because its my right as a female. I have asked everybody to send me copies of any pics they have of me circa christmas. I'm going to put them into my phone. So if I ever go out and start umming and ahhing about healthy vs greasy, I can simply open my phone and see a pic to reinforce my willpower. I'm going to take a picture of my singlet top and put it on the fridge, to stop browsing behaviour.

Its going to be a long, hard slog. Outside the gym I intend to chose healthy options. My eating style at home won't change much. Its already pretty healthy, but not perfect. Hey, a girl's gotta be happy! I intend to make smarter choices when I go out for lunch and dinners. Starting now.

What I want from this blog.

2008-08-06T18:04:00.000+10:00

This is a private space where we can all go through the weight loss journey together. There are a few things that I will insist upon, but ultimately the choice is yours as to whether you'd like to do them.

I would really like people to write a short introduction when they join this blog - why you want to lose weight, why now is the right time, your ultimate goal and quite a lot of short term goals. I would really like people to post once a week/fortnight (as they see fit) with weights, measurements (if you're doing measurements) and a quick summary of the week. I think it would be a great idea if we all wrote something positive about our weight loss week. Once a month a full body pic would show us just how far we're going.

I would like this to be a place of support. If you're struggling you can turn to us here. Sometimes its nice to use this blog to empty your head. I'd like it if we could use this place to swap recipes and tips. I don't think this blog would be best used for calorie counting or as a food diary.

I want this blog to be positive. Its going to be an uphill battle. Its going to be hard work and there are times when you're going to want to give up. The outcome is worth the fight though. If you have the time/money/motivation to see it through. I don't want people to berate themselves or feel guilty for slipping up. It happens. Enjoy the moment and get back to eating healthy tomorrow.

I would also like it if we could group our blog posts together via tags. (e.g phishez - results, recipes, tips)

This blog is for all contributors. Ultimately I want everyone here to be comfortable. What I want isn't the final say. So, are you still interested?

Email me at phishez_rule@hotmail.com if you want to join.

In the beginning.

2008-08-04T22:29:00.000+10:00

In the beginning there were huge thighs. A gigantic flabby belly, and a butt so wide it didn't even resemble a butt.

Then came stress. And weight loss happened. Now the weight loss has stopped.

This is my journey.